We All Just Want Positive Attention

When I started going to yoga classes back in 2003, I found a class that I loved.  It made me work hard physically, it appealed to me intellectually, and the teacher would give me positive praise!  How often do we, as adults, get positive praise somewhere???  Not often.  I can't believe what a difference that made to me.  The teacher purposefully learned everyones name so she could give positive feedback.

In a teacher development workshop last week, I realized again the importance and effectiveness of positive reinforcement/feedback.  Research shows that when you praise a specific behavior a child does, the likelihood of them doing it again increases tremendously, AND other students will mimic the behavior in hopes of getting that same praise.

Our words are so important.  I realize that more and more as I teach.  How I phrase tasks makes a huge difference in how the students do it!  How I praise or don't praise behavior I want to see makes a huge difference in the behavior of the students.

So why is this harder for me to accomplish at home??  I do give positive reinforcement verbally and in other ways to my daughter.  But I feel I could do more.  And I don't think I give nearly enough to my husband.    They say it can feel unnatural at first to word things properly.  But eventually it feels natural.  So I will start practicing now!  And I challenge you to notice this week how much specific positive praise you get or give!

The Queen of Paralyzed Perfection

So my Health Challenge is almost done.  Only one more week left.  Have I lost eight pounds like I thought I could/should?  Umm, no.  Have I eaten less desserts/sweets?  Yes!  I have definitely done better, though not perfect, at not having dessert every day. Have I realized that I eat too much food sometimes, not just too much desserts?  Yes!  I thought my main problem was sweets, and if I cut those out I'd lose weight.  But my mind? or whatever is so tricky, I just eat more of other foods to make up for the lack of sweets!

So I haven't lost as much weight as I wanted.  But I have gained a new friend.  She helped me decorate my bedroom, we went running together, we've laughed together, sent LOTS of texts, and supported each other through the challenge.  Fun!  I don't know why it's taken me so long to open up enough to get someone to do something like this with me.  (Well, maybe I do know why, but that's another story).

The point is, I've been thinking about my 'issues' with food.  And it's tied to my 'issue' of wanting to look good to other people on the outside in many ways.  The way my house looks, the way I look.  And that is all tied to 'issues' with perfectionism.  I read an excellent article tonight in BYU Magazine (the magazine for alumni), titled "That's How the Light Gets In".  This article is all about our desires for THE correct answer to something, or doing things 'Perfect" every time we do anything.  The author, Tyler J. Jarvis, says, "You could say we are paralyzed by perfection."  Well, I am the Queen of that!  The Queen of not doing things til I can do them perfectly, thus there are many things I didn't do soon enough or wasn't brave enough to try!!!!

Jarvis gives four steps to becoming unparalyzed:  1) Admit and Accept Imperfection.  I love the example he gives of his wife as a missionary.  She and her companion wanted to obey ALL the mission rules exactly.  But when they couldn't fit everything in their schedule, they realized it would take 25 hours/day! So they had to make do with an approximation, or in other words, admit and accept imperfection.  But I've learned as I've taught PE full-time the past two years, 90% of success is just showing up!  I may not be a perfect PE teacher, but if I just show up, I'm pretty good!  That's accepting imperfection.

2) Work Hard to Get Your Best Approximation.  "..admitting and accepting imperfection allows us to find imperfect but workable solutions to our personal and spiritual problems---but these solutions still require deep thought and hard work".

3)  Act on Your Best Approximation.  God wants us to take action!  Go for it!  Just do it!  We WILL make mistakes!  But do it anyway, because that is how we learn.

4)  Do It Again.  Meaning, repeat steps 1-3.  As we do this, our knowledge will be refined and we will improve.

In Leonard Cohen's song "Anthem", we read:

Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack in everything
That's how the light gets in.

"Our bells are cracked.  But let's ring those bells that still can ring.  Stop worrying about your failure to achieve perfection---perfection is not possible in this life.  Instead embrace the light and healing power of Christ that come in through our cracks and imperfections.  There is a crack in everything.  That's how the light gets in."

I love that idea.  Now I'm doing the hard work to find my best approximation of eating healthy.

Here's to the First Step!

We all have 24 hours in our day, and we are all creatures of habit.  It is so difficult to change some habits!  It takes thought, and energy, and time.  I feel the need to create some new afterschool and evening habits so that I am more productive, but haven't quite gotten that done yet.  In the past couple of years, I've often been so tired after school, that it takes a couple of hours to just get some energy back!  But I started taking several vitamins this past month, and I'm wondering if that's helping me feel less tired, because I do!  Such a blessing to not be so exhausted after school!

I still think it's fine to have some kind of afterschool routine to unwind from the day.  But then need to move on to other things.  Wedding Album to finish!  Cruise Album to finish!  Family Album to finish!  Learn a new song on the piano!  Finish my knitted scarf!  Start a crochet project!  Not to mention start doing Family History research!!  But it is so easy to let time slip by watching a tv show, or reading Facebook or emails.  Plus sometimes my daughter needs me to help her with something, or go to a meeting or shopping with her.

Well, just have to plan what I can do, than take action and do it!  Keep it simple.  One project each day that I can work on.  As the saying goes, "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step."

Five Tips for Breaking Bad Habits

Here is what I've learned the last few years about breaking/changing bad habits:

1.  Turn to Christ first.  Make Him the focus of your day by reading scriptures first thing in the morning, then throughout the day checking if you're still focused on Him.

2.  Be willing to suffer for a season!  Christ can help us change, but we have to do all we can!  And changing bad habits is difficult.  Just telling myself to expect some suffering for a while helps me prepare for it.

3.  Replace bad habits with good.  Again, rather than focusing only on the bad habit, start replacing it with good habits, one habit at a time.  For instance, if eating dessert every night is the habit you want to change, replace it with drinking herbal tea or chewing gum at night.  You can also replace it with an activity at night, such as playing piano/guitar or knitting.

4.  Reach out to others.  Friends are so important in life!  Whether you have a friend that is working on a goal with you or is just a friend, they can be a support and listening ear.  Plus it is just as important for you to ask how their life is going, and be their listening ear!  It helps so much to get you 'out of your box'.

5.  Notice your thoughts.  Do you have thoughts of succeeding?  Or do you lose faith in times of temptation?  Write down the kind of person you want to be, then act as if you are already that person!  In other words, 'Fake it til you Make it!'.  There is a lot of power in that.  As the saying goes, "Do the thing and you will have the power."  I believe that!  I've seen it work!

The Best Kind of Art

Totally cried watching an episode of "Merlin" tonight.  Sheesh.  I am such a romantic.  I cry at television shows.  I love a good story with characters I believe and care about.  As a teenager it was books that I devoured and lost myself in.  Sometimes it is still books (The Hunger Games would be one).  But also beautfiul dances (especially contemporary dance duets on So You Think You Can Dance), live musical theater (Les Miserables), and good movies.  There is a lot of good art out there.  But probably even more "bad" art, or maybe I should call it art that is technically well done, but is not uplifting in any sense, and appeals to man's base senses.  I love the kind of art that makes me want to be a better person.  That gives me hope.  That shows the best in mankind, along with their struggles.  That shows  people who laugh together along with struggle together.  Makes me want to keep trying to build that kind of connection in my own relationships.  So others will be inspired and find hope.

Musings on Merlin

So I've cut back on tv watching this summer.  Why waste the time unless I really like it, you know?  But I wanted some interesting story to entertain me.  So I'd heard the kids talk about the British series "Merlin", and decided to check it out.  Watched a couple of episodes of the first season (there are now five seasons) and was hooked.  Good writing, action, humor, romantic tension building very slowly, and characters I believe and like.

So I guess I'm a hopeless romantic.  I am so happy to see Arthur fall for Guinevere in his awkward way, as a person who has been taught to treat servants a certain way.  Then to see Guinevere and Lancelot fall for each other, and to see Arthur notice that they have affection for each other just breaks my heart!  Maybe I should be rooting for Guinevere and Lancelot, but I'm not.  I like Guinevere and Arthur.  She is so good for him and his heart is genuinely kind!  And of course I know how the story traditionally ends, but my daughter says to watch it because it may be different than what I expect.  ????   I guess I will have to continue to watch!

Where is Chivalry?

We've had three young men from the Ukraine and Moldova staying with us the past two weeks.  One of them is very chivalrous/gentlemanly about helping me carry groceries, gettting things in cupboards that are too high for me, getting silverware unstuck from the dishwasher, etc. It has reminded me how much that is lacking in my life.  Maybe it's my fault I haven't trained my husband to be that way more?  My youngest son did start doing that kind of thing before he left.  Anyway, I miss it.  Or I should say, I've never had that kind of treatment, and I would like it.  To be treated like I'm special and someone wants to be around me and help me.  I guess we're all that way. But then again, am I treating others that way?

Push the Pause Button

Why are our lives so much like the movie, "Groundhog Day"? Why do we keep doing the same actions when we don't like the results of them?  Why does my husband keep putting his dirty dishes in the left sink instead of the right, when I've told him A MILLION  times they go in the right side??  Why do I let myself be bothered or upset when he complains about his health problems?  Why do I still use too many words to tell him what I'm doing, when he's told me over and over to "get to the point"??  I guess there are two issues here:  1) changing our reaction to things, and 2) learning to communicate more clearly verbally.  You'd think they could be easily done by mature, educated adults.  Hahaha!  I guess that's why there is so much drama in life, and psychologists needed, attorneys, etc. etc. etc.  We're human, and changing is not easy.  Not impossible (though sometimes it seems so), but definitely not easy.  I just need to think ahead and plan a different way to react, then make sure I push the PAUSE button when the same old routine starts to roll, and insert the new way of behaving.  Finally get out of the endless loop and start a new scene in life.  Cliche but true!

It's a Sad, Sad Sunday

I'm missing my youngest son tonight.  Sunday evenings are hard for me.  What should I be doing with my time, and what do I actually do?  Son #3 could be depended on to liven things up with his smile, his humor, his music, or by creating some action by bringing friends over.  I guess I don't create enough action of my own.  Or maybe this is just the let-down after the busybusybusy summer I've had.  Good thing I've got work starting this Thursday.  I need more structure.

Letting Go

Been pondering how last summer I was at a weight I like for myself.  And it seemed easy to stay there.  A combination of things got me there without really 'trying',  mainly a regular work schedule and getting sick for a month, such that I was so tired that I didn't eat after dinner.  Once I was at that weight, as I said, it was easy to stay there.  I didn't obsess about it.  Just ate less overall and didn't eat after dinner usually.  And ate pretty healthily but didn't completely deny myself anything.  I stayed at that weight all last winter (a year ago), spring, and summer on my Greece cruise and trip to San Diego (where I surfed for the first time).

Then when school started again last fall, I started eating treats at night.  Gained 5 lbs. in fall.  Another 5 over the holidays.  Pretty much have stayed around there within a couple of pounds since.  Food and especially sweets are the comfort I turn to.  Like a lot of people.  I don't understand why I didn't turn to them during that particular time.  Doesn't matter.  Just need to go back to that.

 I always try too hard at things I want.  Somehow have to keep re-learning to not try so hard!  How do you do that?  You let go.  That seems to be a lesson I am learning over and over my entire life.  Letting go.  What does that mean??  For me it means putting some effort in to reaching goals, but not too much.  Don't focus only on what I want.  Lighten up, laugh, have moderation, open up to other people, serve others, be involved in things that interest me.  I guess it's just letting go of that image of perfection in my brain.  The closest I come to feeling like I let go is doing modern dance, which is probably why I love it (and the little surfing I've done feels like it could be that way also).  So here's to modern dance and surfing!!

Post-Wedding Ruminations

The past two weeks were full of Wedding Fever at our house.  I was crazily, busily finishing preparations for the wedding, then attending all the wedding activities with family, visiting with family, then the hubby and I driving to Washington state for the open house.  Finally back home again.  Putting the house and finances back in order.  Looking at wedding photos and thinking that we are truly blessed.  Our family is blessed, and our son who just got married is blessed.  What a beautiful young lady he married.  What a wonderful, down to earth, talented, hard working family he married in to!  And the support of so many of his friends at the wedding just makes me cry!  What an amazing group of young men, The Man Cave.  I couldn't ask for better friends for my son, or a better bride and in-laws.  Just going to soak in that wonderful feeling.

Sometimes You Just Need a Cookie and a Friend

It's getting lonely around here.  The hubby off for a river running weekend (kayaking), daughter off with friends for the evening.  My friend came by and we visited, couldn't decide on any movies worth going to see, so eventually just went to Smart Cookie and had cookies and Frozen Chocolate drink.  Yummy!  Refreshing drink!  Tasty cookies!  Sat outside at a patio table outside the store and ate and chatted.  I am a person who grew up in a large family, but didn't mind having alone time.  Have always needed it really.  One of my sisters schedules her days so full with stuff I don't know how she survives.  I have to have some down time.  But, now with my children getting older, I don't want too much alone time!  Which is why I like the structure of teaching full time in my life right now.  But anyway, tonight it was nice to not be alone at home.  To go out with a friend on a lovely warm summer evening, enjoy a treat, and visit. How lucky am I to have such a good friend, and good cookies?!

Social Saga of a Son

My oldest son stopped by home today.  Finishing up details for his wedding next week, picking up his fiance at the airport.  I'm so excited for him!  He has always been a good child.  Obedient.  Very shy in junior high and high school, which made it tough to make friends and have a social life.  I worried about him in high school, because I knew he wanted to be out socializing.  Finally, the second half of his senior year, a girl asked him to the Sweethearts Dance.  And they were dressed so cute they won the vote for King and Queen of the Dance!  And being asked to the dance and having a good experience really helped him gain confidence in himself.  Then he joined the track team, and there were a number of very nice, friendly kids who included him, including one young man who was a star sprinter on the track team.  This young man became my son's friend and it was wonderful to have my son finally hanging out with friends and doing stuff!  And he asked a girl to prom, and a girl asked him to spring fling!  These experiences made a huge difference in his confidence.

Then he went to his first year of college.  Didn't know his roommate or anyone in his dorm hall.  But ended up becoming best friends with a bunch of them.  They came to our home a couple of times during the school year, they took a trip to California together after school got out (staying at homes of some of the kids), and stayed in touch while on their missions.  Roomed together after their missions.  Now several of them are married, and a lot of them will be here next week for my son's wedding!  What a blessing!!!  I can't even express what a difference their friendship has made to my son.  He has grown so much socially, and is marrying a lovely young lady from a wonderful family!  Aaaah.  The happy peaceful feeling that knowing one of your children is doing well and moving on a good path.

On Getting Older

Growing older is interesting.  All through my forties I felt I still looked pretty good.  I weighed a bit more than I wanted to, but that's another story.  But I exercised regularly and mostly ate healthily and was involved in worthwhile activities.  Then 'the change' happened.  It started three years ago actually, with a couple of migraines.  I'd never had migraines before.  Then hot flashes and night sweats.  About a year of all of that.  Now I'm officially done with 'the change'.  I can tell a definite difference in my energy level and skin.  My skin sags more.  I get tired more easily.  But, on the positive side, I have more time to spend with my husband, because the kids aren't as time consuming!  It's just a bummer that I scare myself when I look in the mirror.

Summer Thunderstorms

Dropped off Noelle to Dance camp this afternoon, did a bunch of wedding 'stuff', then tonight just wanted to sit back and watch a good movie and eat a treat.  Old habits die hard.  Then a summer thunderstorm/rainstorm hit.  Massive amounts of rain!  The most we've had in a loooong time I'd say!  I had to open the front door and just listen and feel the air and smell the damp earth.  Aaaaah.  I love the smell of rain.  I love the sound of rain.  I just love rain.  I remember as a teenager, I would be happy if I woke up and it was raining outside.  Rain is just so....refreshing!  And I needed some refreshment in this busy summer.

Survival of Those Who Endure

You know how they say "survival of the fittest'?  That those who are the most fit or strong are the ones who survive?  Well, I think it's actually "survival of those who endure".  Not necessarily the fittest, most beautiful, most talented, or strongest.  It's the ones who go on the hike even when it scares the heck out of them.  Who continue to put one foot in front of another in a long hike or marathon run. Who keep at the marriage when it's boring or difficult and you feel like you have nothing in common anymore but your children.  Who keep loving their children even when the children make hurtful choices.  It's pretty much life.  Life is not made up mostly of the Christmas photos we see of everyone.  It's made of the sweat and tears and frustration and hurt and laughter and silliness and simple moments of every day.  So, although I did not want to hike in to Havasupai during a heat wave, I did it (albeit we hiked in at 4 a.m.).  And I survived.  And I loved it.  So now I'm glad I endured.  Because I'm learning that if I endure at things, I can surprise myself and make some great memories.

Life is Playing Hardball

Why does life sometimes blast at you?  Instead of throwing you an easy little softball, it throws hard and fast.   Not just one wedding this summer, but three.  Three!  Not just my dad a little sick, but WHAMO!  Oh, he actually has a broken vertebrae, and Oh, he actually has myeloma, a type of cancer that softens his bones and means he has to have chemotherapy treatments for four months.  And BAM!  This week is our awesome hike into Havasupai Falls in the Grand Canyon, but gee, it happens to be the middle of a heat wave in the west!  Right now I don't even want to go on the trip.  It doesn't sound fun anymore.  A vacation would be for me to stay home.  What a crazy game life can be.

Kinesthetic Activities (otherwise known as hobbies)

I am a kinesthetic learner.  I learn best by watching, and then doing.  I love kinesthetic activities like playing the piano, dancing (especially modern dance), hiking, surfing.  For the class I recently took, I had to learn to juggle.  That was supposed to help us remember what it's like to be a beginner at a skill.  I"m still a beginner at it, but that's another story. This year I've added knitting to my activites.  I'm also going to start a crochet project soon, and right now I am learning guitar.  I've always liked acoustic guitar.  I just love the sound of it, and the sound of a person singing with the guitar.  I like Colbie Caillet's music.  And yes, I like Taylor Swift's music.  I'm not sure why I haven't learned guitar before.  The right time just hadn't happened for me yet.  But it's here now.  I think I've been inspired by my son who played guitar with his girlfriend (before leaving on a mission).  It was so fun to hear them!  And they were pretty good!  Anyway, it's just fun to sit down and play the piano sometimes, or put on music I like and dance to it, or knit a scarf or crochet an afghan for my kids.  And play guitar for the fun of it.  It's just satisfying in life to have some activities you do purely for the fun of it. For the joy you get from learning and doing something. And for the fact that they help you forget your troubles and get out of the crazy thoughts running through your head!  I guess almost every skill we learn is kinesthetic in some way.  And that's a good thing.

Get My Shopping Mojo On!

I am not a shopper.  Have never really loved it.  Don't do it with girlfriends. I remember two different occasions when I actually went with a girlfriend.  It just seemed awkward, and I'm way too self-conscious.  Today I was shopping for a skirt to wear to my sons wedding.  Did some shopping for it yesterday also.  Went to more stores today.  Stores, stores, stores.  Skirts, skirts, skirts, dresses, dresses, dresses.  Colors, styles, shapes.  Blaaaaaaaaaa!  It all gets too overwhelming to find THE RIGHT ONE.  That looks good on  me, feels good on me, is not dowdy, and is the right price.  A delicate balance to find all of those attributes in one dress/skirt.  And sometimes I just get overwhelmed by it all and have to pack it in and wait to try another day.  Then sometimes, usually after several days of shopping and narrowing down exactly what I want, the shopping mojo finally hits me and voila!  I find what I want in a short amount of time.  My husband says it's focus.  I like to call it my shopping mojo.  Whatever.  Thank goodness it finally came!

The Power of Nature

I grew up with parents who took us biking, hiking, camping, playing softball, roller skating, swimming, and anything that involved the outdoors.  My husband and I have done the same with our kids.  Especially hiking.  We live literally at the foot of the beautiful, majestic Wasatch mountains.  There are MANY hiking trails in the various canyons within a 20 minute drive of our front door.  Yesterday we hiked one of them.  Amazing how in that short span of time I feel transported to another world.  No blaring of horns, no pollution.  Just rushing streams, birds calling, fresh mountain air.  Sometimes I wish I lived back in another time, when people were more connected to the earth.  I've learned for myself how nature can be healing, and that going outside just a few minutes each day can be calming and/or invigorating.  We have a small vegetable garden and a few fruit trees.  So we are in our own small way, trying to maintain that connection.  I hope we have passed that on to our children.

Divine Intervention in Friendship

Sometimes you meet someone in life, and they end up playing a much bigger part in your story than you could have ever imagined.  That's what happened with a girlfriend of mine.  Our husbands grew up together from junior high on.  My husband met her at college and introduced her to his friend.  They started dating.  Not long after, my husband and I met and started dating.  We did some double dates together and got married about a month apart. Fast forward a few years and we have the same number of children, same number of boys/girls.  We have done trips together and lots of family dinners and game nights.  Our children thought they were cousins growing up.  Then a very difficult period in my life happened, and I would not have made it without her love and support.  She was literally my counselor and confidant and main support.

Today was a luncheon to celebrate her youngest son leaving to serve a two year mission for our church.  She has raised decent, hard-working, God-fearing children.  I thought of all the times she and I have talked, laughed, and cried on the phone, over lunch, and on the ski slopes. I thought of the times she sacrificed to come to my home and help me in a time of need.  Our stories are intertwined now, and I realize God is much smarter than I am at placing people in my life that I will need.  God writes a much better story than I can.

On Being Married to an Artist

I am married to an artist.  Not a visual artist, but a writer, actor, singer, film-maker.  And that's only part of what he's done in his life.  He's climbed about every mountain in our state, and some in other states.  Was a river guide and kayaked many rivers.  Performed in many community musical theatre productions.  Doesn't sit still and just watch tv much.  Which is very good in some ways.  Difficult in others.  Sometimes I wish he were just a regular guy who would help with things around the house.  But then I'd probably be bugged.  As it is, there is never a dull moment.

So You Think You've Got Talent?

I read an interesting book this week for my class.  The book is The Talent Code: Greatness Isn't Born.  It's Grown.  Here's How., by Daniel Coyle.  Very interesting read about how the author went around the world to places (he calls them hotbeds) that seemed to churn out a high number of talented people in a particular skill.  Tennis in Russia, soccer players in Brazil, etc.  Did these people all have a unique talent and just happen to be from the same place, or was something done differently in that place that helped them develop their talent?  It seems that these places did do things differently, and it helped develop their skill.  The book makes the point that we have much more potential to develop talents than we may realize, and if we learn to practice a certain way, that makes all the difference.

So this begs the question, how much of LeBron James' talent is nature, and how much is nurture?  I definitely think nature has something to say about it.  But I also think we can often do more than we realize, if we have the desire, work hard, and practice the right way.  Some people have the physical ability, but no desire.  How about you?  What do you have a passion to learn and do in life right now?  Get up and do it!

Back in the Land of the Living

I was doing so well last week, writing here every day.  Then Monday I started a class I have to take for work.  At 8 a.m.  An hour away.  With homework.  So the homework stuff has kept me pretty busy, on top of fixing meals and getting a little exercise, and staying on top of all things family-related.  But, IT'S DONE NOW!!!  Yea!!!  And I got two free books from it that are very interesting reads (non-fiction, more about that later) and learned some interesting stuff about Motor Learning.  What's that, you say?  Motor Learning.  ie. how we learn physical skills.  And the best way to teach a beginner a skill vs. an advanced learner a skill.  And the importance of practicing skills correctly, so our bodies create myelin and we create good habits and we learn faster that way.  And that positive feedback is HUGE in influencing people.  We humans are absolutely drawn to positive feedback from others.  So that's the goal I need to set for my teaching next fall, is to use more of it.  And use it at home with my family more!  I love learning new stuff, and reviewing old stuff.  But I am back in the land of the living now.  Hello!

You...are Never, Ever, Ever....going to grow up!

When my baby was a toddler, I used to say that to her quite often.  She was too darn fun and cute, and I just wanted her to stay that way!  Well, now all of my kids are older, and my baby is 16!  She gave a talk in church today on Fathers, and did a wonderful job.  She is growing into a beautiful, intelligent, kind young woman.  But I have "moments" when I think I haven't trained her well enough in some ways, or she has moments when she just wants to NOT be around Mom!  A natural part of growing up and becoming her own person I know.  But sometimes I miss those early years of she and I grocery shopping, running errands, going to PTA meetings and play dates.  The pure innocence and joy.  But I can't complain too much, because I know compared to some parents, I've got it really good.  She is hyper careful to get homework done on time, be places on time, and do well at whatever she's doing.  Sometimes I have to make sure she's not overscheduled or pushing herself too much for an impossible perfection. She has good friends, is involved at church, and cares about her family. Lest you think she's perfect, one look in her bedroom will tell you she's not.  But darn it, she didn't listen to me, and she IS growing up!  At least sometimes, when we're sitting in church, she'll lay her head on my shoulder, and I can enjoy her being my little girl again.

Father's Day Hikes and Bugs (not Hugs)

So what do I remember most about my Dad?  Always up early in the morning (singing "Up in the morning, early to rise, work like the devil for my pay.  But that lucky old son, ain't got nothin' to do, but roll 'round heaven all day!"), and wrestling with us as young children.  Taking us hiking, biking, roller skating, playing softball, basketball, fishing; anything that got us out and moving.  But also I remember delicious breakfasts of eggs and biscuits and sausage he made for us on special mornings, 20-minute power naps on his back on the living room floor after lunch, playing with his dog, riding and training his mules, and teasing my Mother.

What will my kids remember about their Dad?  Probably him singing at the top of his lungs as he practiced for another musical, and hiking in the mountains, the dessert, the park, anywhere.  Trying to teach them different trees, plants, bugs, bugs, and more bugs!  Giving a dollar to the child who found the most interesting bug on a walk. Talks about politics and the world and being good stewards.  Can't complain about any of that.  I'm lucky.  My kids are lucky.

Ooh, you make me smile

Get up.  Send email to Son #3 who I miss everyday. Go for a walk/jog (which is what I do instead of running now), check for an email from Son #3, weed in my front garden for an hour, check email again, shower, check email, eat lunch, check email.  Yeehaw!!! Finally!!!  Read email from said son.  He is happy, healthy, and his typical cheerful, humorous, upbeat self.  Wow it's so nice to have a personality like that in your family.  The life of the party.  The person who makes everyone feel good, and is just naturally funny and fun and charismatic.  Just a fun person to have around!  Even though he's gone for now, his letters bring me joy, and make me want to do better.  Live a better story. Isn't it interesting how much we can affect each other?  We literally become like the people we hang around.  Just thinking of him makes me smile.

What's Your Story?

So I get a Smiley Face sticker for eating good things today! Yeehaw!  But there's a lot more to life than what we eat.  Isn't there?  Because I don't want to look back at my life and remember endless nights (or days) of watching tv or dvd's and eating tasty treats.  I want to look back at my life and say, "Yea, that thing I did was cool.  Those people I met are interesting.  That trip was amazing. I can't believe I managed to do that!"  I want to be able to sit and play piano or guitar or sing because it's fun for me to do. Last summer I went on an incredible adventure with a friend to Europe.  We visited Venice, Italy, then took a cruise on the Mediterranean to several Greek Isles.  Amazing!  But just as amazing were some of the people we met.  One couple travels often, and they save sand from every ocean or sea they've been to.  Cool!  But you don't have to travel the world to have an interesting life.  You just have to lean in to sensation (as they say in yoga). Think about what scares you, and learn about it and lean in to it.  Donald Miller's book, "A Million Miles in a Thousand Years" is a fabulous look at how to turn your life into a great story.  Read it.  Do it.

And, We're Off!

So it's time.  Time to get serious.  Look at desserts in the face and say, "No thanks.  Not today."  And actually do that for several days in a row.  Because for me, the problem is desserts.  Especially cookies.  With chocolate.  Or cake.  With chocolate.  Not usually ice cream.  Except when the weather gets hot.  Then ice cream (with chocolate) can become a problem also. And I've put on a few lovely pounds since last summer that I don't think look all that lovely where they are.  So I'm telling anybody out there in the universe that might see this, that tomorrow I will say No.  I'm not saying No forever and ever.  That makes my brain go crazy.  But moderation.  All things in moderation.  So No tomorrow to some things, but Yes to a lot of other yummy things!  Bring on the Yeses!

Oh, the Cleverness of Me!

I bet the San Antonio Spurs are saying that line (from the movie "Peter Pan") right now.  Show those young smarty-pants whippersnappers what's up!!!  I'm telling myself that right now, because I decided to do this blog as a summer project for myself.  "Oh, the cleverness of me!"  "What?"  I'm asking myself.  "You are too private and don't like ANYONE to know what you're really thinking half the time."  So why am I doing this??  Because things that really scare me I need to do.  So I'm here to show myself I can.  Hopefully it'll be a fun ride.  No, wait, it WILL be a fun ride!

Look and Laugh

Thinking of Dori, "Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming, just keep swimming."  Focus on the positive around you.  Rocky mountains out my window, green garden husband planted, elegant, comfy home, fresh food to eat.  I can choose to act in my world, not just react.  Boy I'm good at reacting.  Today I will smile at the world and laugh.  If you can't laugh, you're taking it all too seriously.  So this blog will become a way for me to look at the world and laugh.

Are You Ready for This?

I'm not sure I am, but life happens anyway.  Child #1 getting married this summer, child #3 off on an adventure.  Let's see if I can keep up with life and firmly comit to change!  Of course, change is going to find me whether I want it to or not.